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When you’re gearing up to head to college, it’s easy to get lost in daydreams about what your experience will be like.
Will college life be all about parties and new social adventures? Will you spend the next four years locked in the library, studying? Or is your college experience going to be centered on sports or other extracurriculars?
The truth is your college life will be completely unique.
While it will likely contain elements of these college-life stereotypes, it’s unrealistic to think that your time on campus will be anything like what you’ve seen in the movies.
Before you leave home and head for college, let’s look at some of the most commonly held beliefs about college, and figure out whether or not they’re realistic.
Myth 1: These will be the best years of your life
You’ve probably met people who parrot this phrase, or you’ve picked up this idea from movies or TV shows that glorify college life. But I’m here to set the record straight: College probably won’t be the best four years of your life.
And that’s a good thing!
If you’re going to your first year of undergrad, it can feel like the next four years are the biggest and most important ones. There’s no denying they will be formative—college will influence your future career path and relationships.
But college is the start of a new journey, and it would be foolish to think that nothing you do after college will ever outshine the two or four years you spend on campus.
The reality is that college, like the rest of life, will have its ups and downs. There’s a good chance you will make some incredible, long-lasting memories that will be some of the fondest of your life. But you will also make more memories like that long after you graduate.
College will also have challenging moments. Remember, you’re going to college to learn important lessons—including some life lessons that will be painful. Broken hearts, toxic friendships, crappy low-paying jobs—all of these were part of my college experience and may well be part of yours too.
You should feel excited for college and confident there will be good times ahead.
But don’t work yourself up by putting unrealistic expectations on college life. Let it be what it is: just one chapter in your rich and interesting life story.
Myth 2: You must have your future figured out
College is where you go to figure out what you’re going to do with your life, right?
Once again, this is a myth that doesn’t really hold up.
It’s true, college will help you map out the first stages of your career. But you do not need to have all the answers about what you want to do on day one—or even by the time you graduate.
College isn’t just about preparing for a specific job; it’s about exploring who you are and what you love. Think of it as an all-you-can-eat buffet of academic and life experiences. You’re supposed to try different things, some of which you might have never considered before.
Many students change their majors—and some do it more than once. Others transfer schools once they find a better fit, or they drop out entirely to pursue one of the many viable alternatives to college.
And all of that is ok.
College is not solely a place where you go to study; part of college life is exploring yourself and your passions. You will find new exciting challenges and meet people who will influence you. All of these experiences will guide you toward your future.
But for now, you don’t need all the answers. You do need curiosity, patience, and an open mind.
Myth 3: College friendships last a lifetime
I graduated over a decade ago, but as I write this, I am sitting just a few feet away from my roommate, who is one of my oldest friends from college.
And in just a few months, I’ll be flying out to New Mexico for a reunion with a bunch of other folks I met during my four years studying in Boston.
But guess what? There are just as many friends from college who I haven’t spoken to since graduation. And there are other folks who I count among my closest friends who I met well after I’d graduated.
It’s true that college life will give you ample opportunities to make new connections, some of which may very well last a lifetime.
But not all friendships are meant to last forever. After graduation, it’s easy to lose touch with friends as our lives take separate paths. And while this can be a sad and painful thing, it’s also entirely natural.
That being said, making new friends as an adult gets harder as you age. So I urge you to use the social opportunities college gives you to forge friendships with like-minded people.
Join clubs, attend events, leave the door open to your dorm room.
Remember that everyone else in your freshman class is just as nervous as you, and step outside your comfort zone. It will get easier, and there won’t be many opportunities in life where you’re surrounded by so many like-minded people your own age.
Remember that friendships are like plants: They need attention and care to grow, and if neglected, they will disappear. This will be doubly true after you graduate—if you want to keep friends in your life, take the initiative to call them and check in on them regularly.
Check out my article on how to be a better friend for more tips on keeping the most important people in your life for the long haul.
Myth 4: College life will make you an instant adult
By the time you graduate from college, you will be much more of a grown-up than you were going in. And from day one of freshman year, you will have new independence and more adult responsibilities than you had when living at home.
However, most of the growing up that will come during college will happen slowly over the next few years, not all at once. Expect there to be plenty of challenges, big and small, along this journey.
The good news is, college is designed to help you meet these challenges. Your school will provide you with a sense of safety and structure, but also give you the freedom to experiment, make mistakes, and choose your own path.
What’s more, the process of growing up doesn’t end when you graduate. In fact, the first few years after college can feel like a second growing-up period, when you learn how to live life without the support of your college system.
Don’t see these challenges as setbacks. Instead, you must be open to learning new things and, most importantly, asking for help when you need it. Do not be too proud to reach out to your professors, your friends, or your family when you’re struggling.
Give yourself grace and patience as you learn, and don’t beat yourself up if you need to call home to ask for help.
Myth 5: A prestigious degree is the most important thing
Guess how many times I’ve been asked where I went to college during a job interview?
Exactly zero.
Sure, I list my college on my resume. But in most cases, employers are more likely interested in your experience, soft skills, and personality than they are in your degree.
It’s true that, in some cases, going to a school with a prestigious name may give you a slight advantage during the job application process, especially if you’re going into a highly specialized field. But there are so many other factors that employers consider—the name of your school is not likely to be the deciding factor.
And on the flip side, there’s no guarantee that a prestigious (or expensive) degree will be the thing that lands you the perfect job. There are people with degrees from Harvard and Stanford who work alongside people from lesser-known schools, or people with no degrees at all.
If you’re currently trying to decide where to apply for college, avoid choosing schools based solely on their reputation.
Instead, you should be weighing several factors when considering your options. Look for schools that have programs that excite you. If possible, tour the schools you’re considering and assess the college life on campus to see if it’s a good fit. Meet with alumni, counselors, and current students to ask questions. Talk to financial aid so you understand the costs of different colleges.
Use all of this information to guide you toward the school that will be best for you. If you do that, you’ll be on a path that will bring you joy and satisfaction, no matter what school name is on your diploma.
Myth 6: A good education will leave you with a mountain of debt
College today is more expensive than it’s ever been. And take it from me—it’s easy to rack up a huge amount of debt in pursuit of a degree.
But you do not need to take out enormous loans to get a good degree. There are many ways you can avoid chaining yourself to monthly payments, though it will require some strategy.
Helping college students avoid mountains of debt is a passion for me, so I’ve compiled my Ultimate Guide on How to Make Money in College. You can check out the different parts of the series here:
Your college life is likely to be educational, fun, exciting, and mind-expanding. It will also challenge you as you’ve never been challenged before. So don’t add additional pressure on your college years by having unrealistic expectations!
You should be excited to see what college has in store for you—but don’t let these common myths trip you up before you get to campus.